Friday, December 31, 2010

This is not a Resolution Post

I don't believe in New Year's Resolutions. I figured out a long time ago that the rush of 'new' wears off in about seventeen days and all of that which we intend to revolutionize about ourselves gets crammed in a drawer to minimize the guilty discomfort of yet another failure. Instead, I have decided to issue New Years Admonitions; none of this feel good 'turning of the year' nonsense.

1. Quit wasting time whining about your body. Move for the joy of movement. Decorate it. Get yourself some color and sparkle, adorn yourself joyfully, and add up all the parts you denigrate separately into something that is worthy, uniquely yours, and beautiful RIGHT NOW. If I hear you saying "My fat butt" or "My stupid (whatever)" I'm going to call you on it. Who is policing and shaming you? Why are you letting them? Tell them to shut up. Tell yourself to shut up if you have to. There is something called 'Health at Every Size'. Find out about it here.

2. If there are things in your life that are dragging you down, making you miserable, contributing to a trapped and hopeless feeling, GET RID OF THEM. This life is to be lived. If it involves buying a box of trash bags at Sam's and filling them with all the clutter that has made you feel like you are drowning THROW IT THE HELL OUT. Negative people can be placed on the same curb. Even if you can't get them out of your life you can choose to stop buying into their misery. Inform them of your boundaries. Invite them to get over it.

3. Stop wasting your energy being perpetually unsatisfied. Do you spend most of the day complaining about stuff? WHY?? Stop it right now. You are awash in blessing. They may be small. It may take a flexing of some mental and spiritual muscles you've let go to see and appreciate them. But they are there. Don't let the world tell you what you need to be happy. The world is easily confused, distracted, and deceived.

4. You are surrounded by the fragile, the hurting, the walking wounded. Every single day. You don't have to be a miracle worker to heal them. You just have to be kind. Cynicism and indifference kills just as surely as violence, but slower.

5. Stop. Every once in a while, just stop. Practice saying the words "No", "No, thank you, not today", "Thank you for thinking of me, but no." Its better that a few get your very best effort and attention than many getting what you can spare, and resentfully at that. I promise you that the refused will get by without you.

6. Every single person on the planet including Jesus Christ has had to deal with other people who hold opinions of them that are unwarranted, unkind, and unfair. You are not a special snowflake in this. It should neither surprise nor consume you.

That's it, kiddos. Don't wait until December 31 to celebrate what's 'happy' and 'new'. You get that every minute of the day.


Kristen said...

You rock. Great words to live by. And great to see you writing again! :)

Anonymous said...

Awesome - just what we all need - a little dose of getting real !

Thank you !

Lidian said...

Fabulous advice. Love love love your post! I did make a couple of resolutions but they are teeny (though I made some ridiculously ambitious plans on my history blog but that doesn't count as resolutionary, really - right?)

Happy New Year!

Murr Brewster said...

This is so well put. A real sparkler of a post. Happy new year and here's to lots of movements.

Lin said...

BEST. LIST. EVER!!! I love this. So well put. How come when I say these things folks just get mad at me?? I'm gonna point to you now and say "See??! She's RIGHT!" :)

Lin said...

I hope you don't mind--I copied this to put on my fridge. :)

Linda said...

You are right on the money! Great advice and words to live by.

MikeWJ at Too Many Mornings said...

I wish I'd read this back in December. Wise advice that might have helped keep me off the rollarcoaster I've been riding lately. I really wish you'd write more often.